This Is Who I Am

Break time. Headed home for some turkey day good times. :)

The Blue Whale ejaculates over 40 gallons of Sperm when Mating. Only 10% enters the female, and you always wondered why the sea tasted salty?

Its been a while

I CAN’T WAIT TO BE A FATHER! :))

kimpoyfeliciano:

I’m gonna make my baby wear CLOTHES like these..

I’m gonna teach him how to DANCE and he’ll be like..

We’re gonna WEAR matching clothes like this when we go out..

And I’m gonna teach him how to TREAT GIRLS right. ;)

(via foreverinlovewith)

When a guy likes a girl but the girl sees him strictly as a friend she usually says something like “you are a great guy but I don’t like you that way.” Somehow this is supposed to be perfectly understandable but look at it this way. This would be like going to a job interview and the company saying: “you have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for but we are not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But we are going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn’t work out, we’ll hire somebody else, but still not you. In face, we will never hire you but we will call you from time to time to complain about the person we hired instead of you.”

Beard Compliment Translations

cle12ek:

tara—jay:

sunnysunny:

pyrexia:

“Wow, that’s a really nice beard you have.”

I want to have sex with you. 

“Are you working on growing a beard?”

I would be extremely attracted to you if you started growing a beard.

“I hope you’re planning on growing out your beard for winter.”

I would be DTF if you had a winter beard.

“Your beard looks good today.”

My pants are coming off.

I can not stop laughing.

ATTENTION ANNA ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Aw now people tell me..

(Source: sunshine-and-sleeplessness)

First Day of Fall Semester

First Day of Fall Semester